More jokes from Bubba

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Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and

family values.


Bill said, ‘I didn’t sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?’


Larry replied, ‘I’m not sure, what was her maiden name?’

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A little boy went up to his father and asked: ‘Dad, where did my

intelligence come from?’


The father replied. ‘Well, son, you must have got it from your mother,

cause I still have mine.’

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‘Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,’ the divorce Court

Judge said, ‘And I’ve decided to give your wife $775 a week,’


‘That’s very fair, your honor,’ the husband said. ‘And every now and

then I’ll try to send her a few bucks myself.’

___________________________________________

A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room,

took the husband aside, and said, ‘I don’t like the looks of your wife

at all.’


‘Me neither doc,’ said the husband. ‘But she’s a great cook and really

good with the kids.’

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An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has

been living with for the last 40 years.


The Wizard says, ‘Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words

that were used to put the curse on you.’


The old man says without hesitation, ‘I now pronounce you man and wife.’

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Two Reasons Why It’s So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder:


1. The DNA all matches.


2. There are no dental records.

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A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, ‘Can you tell me how long it’ll

take to fly from San Francisco to New York City ?’

The agent replies, ‘Just a minute.’

‘Thank you,’ the blonde says, and hangs up.

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Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.


‘How was he killed?’ asked one detective.

‘With a golf gun,’ the other detective replied.

‘A golf gun! What is a golf gun?’



‘I don’t know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.’

 __________________________________________


Moe: ‘My wife got me to believe in religion.’

Joe: ‘Really?’

Moe: ‘Yeah. Until I married her I didn’t believe in Hell.’

 ___________________________________________



A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears and

asks him how he is feeling.

‘I’m O. K. but I didn’t like the four letter-words the doctor used in

surgery,’ he answered.


‘What did he say,’ asked the nurse.


‘Oops!’



___________________________________________



While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display

of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since

I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband’s

advice..



‘What do you think?’ I asked. ‘Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?’



‘Better get a bikini,’ he replied. ‘You’d never get it all in one.’



He’s still in intensive care.



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The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap

of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by

even more thunder rumbling in the distance.



The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, ‘Well, she’s

there.’

Written on October 20th, 2011 , Bubba's - Funny Bone Tags:
Raising the Federal Debt Ceiling

If you can answer this correctly, you can answer the question on what

action to take on raising the Federal debt ceiling:

You come home from work and find there has been a sewer backup and
you have sewage up to your ceilings.

What do you do . . .

Raise the ceilings, or pump out the shit?

Yes, I can to the same answer as most of you.

Written on August 30th, 2011 , Bubba's - Funny Bone Tags:
Humor, now that’s funny

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75 year old rancher, who’s hand was caught in the squeeze gate

while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man.
Eventually the topic got around to Obama and his role as our president. The
old rancher said, ‘Well, ya know, Obama is a ‘Post Turtle.
‘Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him, what a ‘post
turtle’ was.
The old rancher said, ‘When you’re driving down a country road and you come
across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that’s a ‘post turtle.’
The old rancher saw the puzzled look on the doctor’s face so he continued to
explain. “You know he didn’t get up there by himself, he doesn’t belong up
there, he doesn’t know what to do while he’s up there, he’s elevated beyond
his ability to function, and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put him
up there to begin with.”

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Written on July 28th, 2011 , Bubba's - Funny Bone Tags:
Get Your Bubba On

We think life is supposed to be fun and enjoyed at Bubba’s Back Porch, we try to not take ourselves too seriously and hope we can always provide you with the best in outdoor gear and tips for the best experience and a few laughs along the way.

We get many pictures from of our friends and customers asking us to run a photo contest or just post their funny pics from camping or hunting with their family and friends. As we all know strange things occur sometimes when we spend time in the woods or lake & streams. Maybe it’s the beer or whisky not sure but I know we get lots of great photo’s of folks just behaving done right out of control but they mostly seem to be having a good time. Might wake up in the mud with a killer headache or half naked and have no damn idea how they got there but you can be sure one of your buddies will commemorate the moment with his cell phone camera to share with everybody and us later.

Get your Bubba on like bubba bob does

The annual traditions of opening night at deer or elk camp are much beloved by most of us, way to much to eat and drink. We all seem to forget that we never really like whisky anyway but by god when the start doing shots you step right up and shudder with the best of em knowing damn well you will get heartburn later for this and love every darn minute of it too.

Those stories ger better with every passing year you hiked 10 miles uphill dragging that deer thru the mud and brush just to get your rig and oh yes it was at least a 400 yard shot and he was running full out and you just squeezed off your shot leading him by 6 inches over his front shoulder.

Yep we all now those city boys have no clue about how much fun their missing out on growing up experiencing the great outdoors like the rest of us.

 

So send us those pictures and well figure out a fun way to start a gallery of Bubba’s best pic’s.

Next time your outdoors be careful you might just end up on Bubba’s Photo Gallery or Bubba’s Facebook site.

 

Written on July 28th, 2011 , Bubba's - Funny Bone Tags:
WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU MARRY A LOUISIANA GIRL


Three friends married women from three different states.

The first man married a woman from Oklahoma . He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away.

The second man married a woman from Texas . He gave his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. The first day he didn’t see any results, but the next day he saw it was better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done and there was a huge dinner on the table.

The third man married a girl from Louisiana . He ordered her to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed, and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn’t see anything, the second day he didn’t see anything but by the third day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, and his arm was healed enough that he could fix himself a sandwich and load the dishwasher. He still has some difficulty when he pees.

Written on October 17th, 2010 , Bubba's - Funny Bone Tags:
Will Rogers, funny sayings

 

 

 

Will Rogers, who died in a 1935 plane crash, was one of the

 

greatest political sages this country has ever known. 

 

 

 

Enjoy the following:

 

1. Never slap a man who’s chewing tobacco.

 

 

 

2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

 

 

 

3. There are two theories to arguing with a woman.

 

Neither works.

 

 

 

4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

 

 

 

5. Always drink upstream from the herd.

 

 

 

6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

 

 

 

7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it

 

and put it back into your pocket.

 

 

 

8. There are three kinds of men:

 

The ones that learn by reading.

 

The few who learn by observation.

 

The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence

 

and find out for themselves.

 

 

 

9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

 

 

 

10. If you’re riding’ ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then

 

to make sure it’s still there.

 

 

 

11. Lettin’ the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier’n puttin’ it back.

 

 

 

12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring.

 

He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him.

 

The moral: When you’re full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

 

 

 

 

 

ABOUT GROWING OLDER… 

 

 

 

First ~Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying

 

about your age and start bragging about it.

 

 

 

Second ~ The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for. 

 

 

 

Third ~ Some people try to turn back their odometers.

 

Not me; I want people to know ‘why’ I look this way.

 

I’ve traveled a long way, and some of the roads weren’t paved.

 

 

 

Fourth ~ When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth,

 

think of Algebra.

 

 

 

Fifth ~ You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks. 

 

 

 

Sixth ~ I don’t know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.

 

 

 

Seventh ~ One of the many things no one tells you about aging

 

is that it’s such a nice change from being young.

 

 

 

Eighth ~ One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.

 

 

 

Ninth ~ Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

 

 

 

Tenth ~ Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks,

 

it was called witchcraft.

 

Today it’s called golf.

 

 

 

And, finally ~ If you don’t learn to laugh at trouble,

 

you won’t have anything to laugh at when you’re old.

Written on May 7th, 2010 , Bubba's - Funny Bone Tags:

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